Difference between revisions of "Improve Social Skills"
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| − | Good social skills are an important part of leading a healthy, happy and enjoyable life. Studies have proven a positive correlation between social skills and mental health.<ref>http://www.minddisorders.com/Py-Z/Social-skills-training.html</ref> This | + | Good social skills are an important part of leading a healthy, happy and enjoyable life. Studies have proven a positive correlation between social skills and mental health.<ref name="rf1">http://www.minddisorders.com/Py-Z/Social-skills-training.html</ref> This article will give you advice on how to improve your social skills. |
== 10 Second Summary == | == 10 Second Summary == | ||
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* Reflect on your social interactions. Note what went well and what didn't in past conversations. [[#step_3_4|↓]] | * Reflect on your social interactions. Note what went well and what didn't in past conversations. [[#step_3_4|↓]] | ||
| − | [[Category:Social Gatherings]] | + | [[Category: Social Gatherings]] |
== Steps == | == Steps == | ||
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#*Remember to adjust your vocal volume to suit the surrounding environment. | #*Remember to adjust your vocal volume to suit the surrounding environment. | ||
#*If possible, use the speaking volume of nearby people as a guide. | #*If possible, use the speaking volume of nearby people as a guide. | ||
| − | #Start conversations effectively. Begin by saying something general, rather than overly personal. Try commenting on the weather, bringing up a current event, paying a compliment, or making an observation.<ref>http://www.anxietybc.com/self-help/effective-communication-improving-your-social-skills</ref> Small talk is not always easy; it can be difficult to think of what to say. Here a few examples: | + | #Start conversations effectively. Begin by saying something general, rather than overly personal. Try commenting on the weather, bringing up a current event, paying a compliment, or making an observation.<ref name="rf2">http://www.anxietybc.com/self-help/effective-communication-improving-your-social-skills</ref> Small talk is not always easy; it can be difficult to think of what to say. Here a few examples: |
#*"That's a great hat, where did you get it"? | #*"That's a great hat, where did you get it"? | ||
#*"What's up with this crazy weather?" | #*"What's up with this crazy weather?" | ||
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#*It is appropriate to ask a general question about an upcoming election, but it might be considered inappropriate to ask someone how they personally plan to vote. | #*It is appropriate to ask a general question about an upcoming election, but it might be considered inappropriate to ask someone how they personally plan to vote. | ||
#*While it is okay to ask about religious affiliation in broad terms, it would be a bad idea to ask about their church's views on sexuality. | #*While it is okay to ask about religious affiliation in broad terms, it would be a bad idea to ask about their church's views on sexuality. | ||
| − | #End conversations gracefully. Instead of abruptly breaking off a conversation, use smooth transitions. State that you must leave, and make sure to affirm that you have enjoyed the discussion <ref>http://www.succeedsocially.com/endconversations</ref> Try concluding with positive statements such as: | + | #End conversations gracefully. Instead of abruptly breaking off a conversation, use smooth transitions. State that you must leave, and make sure to affirm that you have enjoyed the discussion <ref name="rf3">http://www.succeedsocially.com/endconversations</ref> Try concluding with positive statements such as: |
#*“I've got to run, but I hope we can talk again sometime.” | #*“I've got to run, but I hope we can talk again sometime.” | ||
#*"Well, I have a bank appointment, but it's been great to chat." | #*"Well, I have a bank appointment, but it's been great to chat." | ||
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===Improving Non-Verbal Communication=== | ===Improving Non-Verbal Communication=== | ||
| − | #Pay attention to your body language. Bodies often communicate messages more powerfully than words. <ref>http://www.columbia.edu/~rmk7/PDF/Adv.pdf </ref> Remember that body language plays an important role in most social interactions. Reflect on the messages you are sending to others through your posture, gestures, eye contact, and facial expressions. | + | #Pay attention to your body language. Bodies often communicate messages more powerfully than words. <ref name="rf4">http://www.columbia.edu/~rmk7/PDF/Adv.pdf </ref> Remember that body language plays an important role in most social interactions. Reflect on the messages you are sending to others through your posture, gestures, eye contact, and facial expressions. |
| − | #*If you are avoiding eye contact, standing far away, or crossing your arms, you are likely telling others that you don't want to interact. <ref | + | #*If you are avoiding eye contact, standing far away, or crossing your arms, you are likely telling others that you don't want to interact. <ref name="rf2" /> |
#*Adopt a confident stance, smile, make eye contact, stand upright, and uncross your arms. You are now more likely to make a good impression. | #*Adopt a confident stance, smile, make eye contact, stand upright, and uncross your arms. You are now more likely to make a good impression. | ||
#Observe others in social situations. Watch the kind of body language they use in successful social interactions. Take note of their posture, gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact. Consider how you might replicate or improve upon their use of body language in your own life. | #Observe others in social situations. Watch the kind of body language they use in successful social interactions. Take note of their posture, gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact. Consider how you might replicate or improve upon their use of body language in your own life. | ||
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#Practice your eye contact, working on making more and more as you get comfortable. Don't feel like you need to stare people in the eyes, especially if you're uncomfortable at first. Just start practicing. Whenever you think about eye contact, make yourself look at someone for just 3-5 seconds. As this gets easier, you'll find yourself doing it naturally. | #Practice your eye contact, working on making more and more as you get comfortable. Don't feel like you need to stare people in the eyes, especially if you're uncomfortable at first. Just start practicing. Whenever you think about eye contact, make yourself look at someone for just 3-5 seconds. As this gets easier, you'll find yourself doing it naturally. | ||
#*If you're not right next to someone, look at their ear lobe, or the spot right between their eyes. They won't be able to tell the difference. | #*If you're not right next to someone, look at their ear lobe, or the spot right between their eyes. They won't be able to tell the difference. | ||
| − | #*If you're nervous making eye contact, some social psychologists suggest that you practice on the TV. Put on the news and keep eye contact with the anchor.<ref>http://www.stevenaitchison.co.uk/blog/6-ways-to-dramatically-improve-your-eye-contact-skills/</ref> | + | #*If you're nervous making eye contact, some social psychologists suggest that you practice on the TV. Put on the news and keep eye contact with the anchor.<ref name="rf5">http://www.stevenaitchison.co.uk/blog/6-ways-to-dramatically-improve-your-eye-contact-skills/</ref> |
#Spend a little extra time getting ready to feel confident in your appearance. Spending some time to make sure you love your look and feel confident will make all other social settings easier to manage. Developing a hygiene routine, buying a new shirt or pair of shoes you love, and dressing how you want to dress improve self-confidence and, thus, social skills. | #Spend a little extra time getting ready to feel confident in your appearance. Spending some time to make sure you love your look and feel confident will make all other social settings easier to manage. Developing a hygiene routine, buying a new shirt or pair of shoes you love, and dressing how you want to dress improve self-confidence and, thus, social skills. | ||
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#Talk to more and more people. Social skills improve through practice. The more you communicate and interact with people, the more skillful you will become. | #Talk to more and more people. Social skills improve through practice. The more you communicate and interact with people, the more skillful you will become. | ||
#*Try not to let negative social interactions get you down. Oftentimes such encounters are not your fault. | #*Try not to let negative social interactions get you down. Oftentimes such encounters are not your fault. | ||
| − | #Join a support group to develop your skills in a safe, comfortable environment. You are not the only one who wants to work on these skills. So why not practice with other people who understand your anxieties? The fact that you want to improve your social skills shows that you are open, kind, and willing to work on your own well-being. Surround yourself with similar people to help you keep growing.<ref>http://www.healthcentral.com/anxiety/search-social-anxiety-283153-5.html</ref> | + | #Join a support group to develop your skills in a safe, comfortable environment. You are not the only one who wants to work on these skills. So why not practice with other people who understand your anxieties? The fact that you want to improve your social skills shows that you are open, kind, and willing to work on your own well-being. Surround yourself with similar people to help you keep growing.<ref name="rf6">http://www.healthcentral.com/anxiety/search-social-anxiety-283153-5.html</ref> |
== Tips == | == Tips == | ||
| − | *For those who suffer from social anxiety and related mental health issues, studies show that group therapy focused on social skills training can have beneficial effects.<ref>http://reocities.com/CollegePark/square/1004/gaudiano-SST.pdf</ref> | + | *For those who suffer from social anxiety and related mental health issues, studies show that group therapy focused on social skills training can have beneficial effects.<ref name="rf7">http://reocities.com/CollegePark/square/1004/gaudiano-SST.pdf</ref> |
| − | *If you have been diagnosed with a form of social anxiety, consider seeking out group therapy opportunities in your community.<ref>http://psychcentral.com/news/2013/12/07/group-therapy-can-lessen-social-anxiety-symptoms/62988.html</ref> | + | *If you have been diagnosed with a form of social anxiety, consider seeking out group therapy opportunities in your community.<ref name="rf8">http://psychcentral.com/news/2013/12/07/group-therapy-can-lessen-social-anxiety-symptoms/62988.html</ref> |
* Always look caring, polite and have a warm and nice smile on your face. Invite people to talk in your group it will make people respect you. Have morals and values and teach people to respect one another, be a teacher and people will respect you, make sure you let people know that they can look up to you for comfort esp with girls. Overall act like your on live national news. | * Always look caring, polite and have a warm and nice smile on your face. Invite people to talk in your group it will make people respect you. Have morals and values and teach people to respect one another, be a teacher and people will respect you, make sure you let people know that they can look up to you for comfort esp with girls. Overall act like your on live national news. | ||
