Be Okay with Having a Communist Friend

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We as humans are social. We gravitate towards one another based on several factors. As we earn each others' trust and friendship, we must learn to deal with our differences. A most common difference that can feel personal is our political views. If you have a friend who supports communism, getting along might be difficult at times, but with respect for each other, you can be okay with your friend who is a communist.

Steps

Working on Your Friendship

  1. Agree to disagree. The best part about making friends is understanding each other. If your friend is communist and you uphold a different ideology, you can still get along very well. Politics will just be one area where you won't meet eye to eye. Understand that you don't have to agree with your friend in order to get along.[1]
  2. Show respect. If someone doesn't share the same beliefs as you do, they don't deserve to be criticized or scrutinized. Set aside their beliefs and treat them based on the respect you feel they deserve. Friendships should be void of harsh treatment of one another. Respect can focus on things such has hard work, treatment of others, their abilities, and characteristics. [2]
  3. Focus on the better aspects in your friendship and find common ground. Arguing about communism is not going to create a strong bond. People offer other interests aside from politics. Figure out what drew you to that person in the first place, such as school, sports, or work. The best friendships are well rounded.
  4. Support your friend if other people pick on them. No one needs to be bullied for what they believe. If your friend receives harsh treatment from others who oppose Communism, stand up for your friend. That will be the best thing for your friendship, and it will open the eyes of others.

Learning About Your Friend's Views

  1. Ask your friend about her or his beliefs. Learning from one another is essential to any relationship, and friends should have a lot to offer. Inquire about your friend's Communist beliefs. Ask open ended questions that start with what or how, and let yourself refrain from any interruptions or judgement.[3]
  2. Learn about communism. Communism is a theory, and when you focus on the errors of those who falsely practiced that theory, you prevent yourself from learning. Try reading The Principles of Communism by Engels, The State and Revolution by Lenin, or The Communist Manifesto by Engels and Marx. Also, be careful with the sources you seek; propaganda and biased journalism exists to create fear and hate at times.[4]
  3. Separate communism from tyranny and dictatorships. A common misconception people hold about communism is what we've seen in the past. Most countries that have attempted to execute a communist economy have resembled more of a dictatorship or a tyranny. [5] A real communist does not support a dictatorship of rulers over the population.
  4. In Marxist theory, all governments in human history have been a class dictatorship, meaning that the state is under the command of the interests of one social class. This is why communists refer to capitalism as the "dictatorship of the bourgeoisie (capitalists)" and refer to socialism as the "dictatorship of the proletariat (workers).
  5. Research the core beliefs of communism. Go online and read books about communism. You will not be sacrificing your own beliefs by educating yourself on the subject. You might be interested to see that communism can be made up of several differentiating political parties similar to what the United States has. Also, communism shares a lot of views that are not necessarily political; communism cares about the environment in a similar way the USA and other countries do.[6]

Having Healthy Discussions

  1. Trying to debunk a political theory by slandering the personal life of the person who supports such theory is called an ad hominem. This is a common logical fallacy so be careful.
  2. Understand your own beliefs. In order to have a good discussion, you must be informed. Learn more about your beliefs. A lot of times, our belief system can be influenced by our surroundings and become innate; however, that natural feeling towards a belief system does not always insure we will be properly informed. Moreover, politics is a huge subject that can change and present new information daily.[7]
  3. Listen with interest and reply without sarcasm. A discussion can turn in to an argument quickly, and the best way to avoid that is by listening like a good parent or student. Listening to someone does not mean you are submitting to their beliefs. Also, when you reply, speak kindly and intelligently. We enjoy a lot of political analysts who use sharp and sarcastic delivery in both monologues and dialogues. However, all that is done for entertainment. In the real world, sarcasm is not received well by all and is taken offensively by a lot people.[8]
  4. Leave out harsh judgments. Your friend doesn't hold communist beliefs just to anger you. If you start feeling angry during a conversation with your friend, ask yourself where the anger is coming from. It might not actually have its source in your friend's beliefs. Distinguishing your vulnerability before hand can help you avoid certain specific topics. If ever you feel the discussion may have triggered you, be kind enough to ask to change the subject.
  5. Realize you cannot impose your beliefs. Having a discussion with your friend is meant to open up friendship and share ideas. If you enter discussions with hopes of manipulating the conversation and influencing your friend's beliefs, then nothing well will come out of it. Ignore any thoughts of changing how your friend views the world. Even if you are passionate about the subject, that doesn't give you the right to impose upon your friend.[9]
  6. Listen to each other. A successful dialogue happens when individuals create new ideas together. The creation and problem solving can only happen with good listening. When your friend is discussing a point, don't interrupt. Give the person time, and don't counter argue by repeatedly stating but but but; using that word immediately negates what was just said, like it didn't even matter. If you wish to get along, you should treat each others ideas as though they do matter.[10]
  7. Admit when you are wrong. If discussions lead to arguments all the time, then something must be changed, and someone must be wrong. If the discussions lead to an argument that you keep bring up over and over again, chances are you can be wrong for trying to manipulate the discussion. Try to refrain from confusing facts for opinions. Facts should speak for themselves--whether you like believing them or not. Opinions are arguable, so when you feel the discussion is getting very opinion heavy, refrain from being stubborn on a certain point. Admitting you're wrong is fine around friends. If you feel admitting you are wrong is some kind of defeat or concession to your friends beliefs, then reevaluate why you have discussions with your friend.[11]

Tips

  • Be kind and supportive of each other.
  • Learn to accept people political ideology
  • Know that a communist and a socialist are NOT the same thing and if you call one the other they may get offended

Related Articles

Sources and Citations

  1. http://beforeitsnews.com/self-sufficiency/2012/12/when-is-it-essential-to-agree-to-disagree-2449642.html
  2. http://www.afraidtoask.com/rules-of-friendship-respect/
  3. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/resolution-not-conflict/201209/8-ways-lose-friends-talking-politics
  4. http://www.treehugger.com/corporate-responsibility/6-green-lessons-we-can-learn-from-communism.html
  5. http://www.differencebetween.info/difference-between-communism-and-dictatorship
  6. http://www.treehugger.com/corporate-responsibility/6-green-lessons-we-can-learn-from-communism.html
  7. http://lifehacker.com/5904594/the-guidelines-for-a-rational-political-discussion-with-friends-and-family?disableinsets=on&utm_expid=66866090-49.VYy4WCNHSyuP6EmjnM93MQ.2&utm_referrer=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.wikihow.com%2FBe-Okay-with-Having-a-Communist-Friend
  8. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/resolution-not-conflict/201209/8-ways-lose-friends-talking-politics
  9. http://lifehacker.com/5879968/how-to-know-when-youre-wrong-and-what-you-can-do-about-it?disableinsets=on&utm_expid=66866090-49.VYy4WCNHSyuP6EmjnM93MQ.2&utm_referrer=http%3A%2F%2Flifehacker.com%2F5904594%2Fthe-guidelines-for-a-rational-political-discussion-with-friends-and-family%3Fdisableinsets%3Don
  10. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/resolution-not-conflict/201209/8-ways-lose-friends-talking-politics
  11. http://lifehacker.com/5879968/how-to-know-when-youre-wrong-and-what-you-can-do-about-it?disableinsets=on&utm_expid=66866090-49.VYy4WCNHSyuP6EmjnM93MQ.2&utm_referrer=http%3A%2F%2Flifehacker.com%2F5904594%2Fthe-guidelines-for-a-rational-political-discussion-with-friends-and-family%3Fdisableinsets%3Don