Get an Uninterested Girl to Fall for You

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Getting a girl to take notice of you can be a challenge, but it may be even harder to get an uninterested girl to fall for you. If you are trying to win over a girl who has turned you down or who just doesn’t seem to notice you exist, there are several things you can do. You can show her how confident you are, show her what makes you special, and smile at her. Just keep in mind that sometimes two people are just not meant to be and you may not be able to win her over.

Steps

Getting Her Attention

  1. Demonstrate your confidence. A girl may not be interested in you if you seem insecure or lacking in self-confidence. Women are more likely to be interested in confident men, so it is important that you show her how confident you are. There are lots of different ways that you can project your confidence, but some of the most effective ones include:[1]
    • Make eye contact. Making direct eye contact is a great way to show a girl that you are interested and also project an air of confidence.
    • Take up space. Taking up space projects your confidence as well, so walk around and stand tall.
    • Joke around with your male friends. Demonstrating that you are social by laughing and joking with your male friends is another way to show her that you are confident.
  2. Talk to her. Strike up a conversation with her and show her what a great guy you are.[2] Research has shown that you can increase someone’s interpretation of your physical attractiveness if you have a great personality. But if you never talk to her, she may never get to see how great of a guy you are.[3]
    • Try asking a favor to break the ice. Ask her if she can pass you a napkin or ask if she will watch your stuff for a minute while you run to the restroom.
    • Try asking a question. Ask if she is enjoying her meal or ask how she usually takes her coffee.
    • Try making a statement. Say, “I love this restaurant!” or “It’s a beautiful day today!”[4]
  3. Show her what makes you special. Everyone has something that makes them special and some people may find these talents or resources attractive. Figure out what you have to offer as a special talent or resource that she may appreciate and then, look for an opportunity to show her this talent or resource. Just make sure that you find a genuine opportunity to show her this side of yourself. Avoid showing off or concocting an unrealistic situation to show her.[5]
    • For example, if you play in a band, invite her to one of your shows. Or, if you are bilingual, find an opportunity to use your second language it in front of her. Or, if you collect movie posters and you know that she is a movie buff too, mention your collection during a conversation and invite her to come and see it.

Enticing her

  1. Take good care of your health. Taking good care of yourself is essential for your overall well being. As an added bonus, she may be attracted to you more if she sees that you are a healthy person. Make sure that you are taking care of your basic needs, such as diet, exercise, and sleep, before you go looking for love. If you are not in good health, take some time to improve your situation before you try to get this girl to notice you.[6]
    • Improve your eating habits, such as by reducing fat and sugar, or eating more fruits and vegetables.
    • Incorporate 30 minutes of moderate physical activity into your daily routine.
    • Sleep for about 8 hours every night.
    • Try meditation, yoga, or deep breathing exercises to help you relax.
  2. Make sure you are always well dressed and well groomed. In addition to tending to your health, you should also be giving plenty of attention to your looks. Looking your best whenever you run into this girl will make it more likely that she will take notice. Try to make grooming and dressing well a part of your daily routine.[7]
    • Shower and shave or groom your facial hair every day.
    • Get a haircut if you have not had one lately.
    • Buy yourself some new clothes.
    • Wear nice smelling cologne and deodorant.
  3. Live your life. By keeping busy and active in your own life, you will show this girl that you are independent and that you have a great life. It will also prevent you from becoming too focused on her, which can be unhealthy. Keep your commitments and make plans with your friends often. If the girl asks to see you, be honest about your schedule and don’t cancel plans just to spend time with her.[8]
  4. Play hard to get. A girl may be more likely to find you desirable if she has to work for your affection. That does not mean that you need to start ignoring the girl you like, but she may take more interest in you if you also seem a bit uninterested. For example, you could greet her the same way that you greet the rest of your friends and avoid giving her any special treatment or compliments.[9]

Winning Her Affection

  1. Take it slow. When you are first getting to know a girl, it is important to avoid sharing too much about yourself too soon. Sharing too much about yourself too soon can be overwhelming for a girl and also makes you seem less mysterious. Keep some of the mystery alive by withholding certain details until you get to know each other better.[10]
    • For example, you should avoid discussing topics like your ex, family conflicts, or your personal finances. Instead, focus on questions that help you get to know her better. Ask her about her likes and dislikes, her friends and family, her interests, etc.
  2. Gaze into her eyes. Research has shown that prolonged eye contact can increase feelings of attraction between two people.[11] If you are trying to win her over, try looking into her eyes with a penetrating gaze. Just keep in mind that she may break the gaze if she is not interested. If she is interested, she will most likely give you some encouraging looks and smiles, even if she takes her eyes away from yours now and then.
    • If a long gaze does not seem appropriate yet or you are just too nervous to hold a long gaze, try giving her frequent, quick glances.[12]
  3. Mirror her body position. Mirroring her body position can show a girl that you are interested and provide opportunities for her to do the same. You might already be doing this without noticing it. But if not, make a conscious effort to start mirroring her body position. For example, if a girl is leaning in towards you with one arm on the table, you can lean in with the opposite arm so that you look like a mirror image of her.[13]
  4. Smile at her. Smiling is an easy way to show a girl that you are interested in her and give her a chance to give you a smile in return. Smiling may also make you seem more attractive to the girl, which may work in your favor as well.[14] Try to keep your smile as natural and relaxed as possible. Don’t force it or smile in a way that is unusual for you.
  5. Watch for signs of interest. As you flirt and do other things to impress a girl, watch for signs that she is interested in you. If she is smiling, making eye contact, and mirroring your body position, then this might be a good sign. Other positive signs include touching her hair, adjusting her clothes, raising and lowering her eyebrows, or giving you a casual touch on the arm.[15][16]
  6. Know when to move on. Sometimes two people are just not meant to be together. If a girl does not show interest after you have done your best to get her attention, move on. She may never change her mind about you and, if you keep chasing her, you may miss your opportunity to meet someone else who really does like you.

Tips

  • Keep in mind that if the girl is not interested in you, nothing may make them fall in love with you. Try not to take it personally and just look for someone who appreciates you.

Related Articles

Sources and Citations

  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201305/how-get-guys-or-gals-attention
  2. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201402/how-flirt-and-be-attractive
  3. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201105/is-your-personality-making-you-more-or-less-physically-attractive
  4. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201112/break-the-ice-how-talk-girls-and-guys-0
  5. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201406/can-your-unique-features-make-you-more-appealing-over-time
  6. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201402/how-flirt-and-be-attractive
  7. http://www.lovepanky.com/men/how-to-tips-and-guide-for-men/how-to-get-a-girl-to-notice-you
  8. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/finding-cloud9/201305/10-dating-dos-and-donts-6-therapists
  9. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201403/when-should-you-play-hard-get
  10. http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/06/23/6-steps-to-finding-new-love/
  11. http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/hottopics/love/flirting.shtml
  12. http://www.today.com/health/5-ways-make-anyone-fall-love-you-1D80244648
  13. http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/hottopics/love/flirting.shtml
  14. http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02699931.2013.817383#.VbJRXvlVikp
  15. http://www.scienceofrelationships.com/home/2011/7/13/how-can-i-tell-if-someone-is-interested-in-me.html
  16. http://www.today.com/health/18-body-language-clues-say-hes-interested-definitely-I283709