Difference between revisions of "Convince Your Parents to Get You a Smartphone"
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#*If you offer to pay at least part of the cost, you’ll be showing your parents that you take the situation seriously and it will make them more likely to give you the benefit of the doubt. | #*If you offer to pay at least part of the cost, you’ll be showing your parents that you take the situation seriously and it will make them more likely to give you the benefit of the doubt. | ||
#*If your parents say no, you can continue saving your money and approach them later, offering to cover even more of the cost to show your commitment. | #*If your parents say no, you can continue saving your money and approach them later, offering to cover even more of the cost to show your commitment. | ||
| − | #Demonstrate your responsibility. In addition to making good argumentative points, you should show your parents that you’re responsible enough to merit a smartphone.<ref>http://schools.cms.k12.nc.us/beverlywoodsES/Documents/Octresponsibility.pdf</ref> | + | #Demonstrate your responsibility. In addition to making good argumentative points, you should show your parents that you’re responsible enough to merit a smartphone.<ref name="rf1">http://schools.cms.k12.nc.us/beverlywoodsES/Documents/Octresponsibility.pdf</ref> |
#*Take care of your current possessions. Keep what you do have, whether it’s a laptop, tablet, or flip phone, in good shape. Protect it, don’t drop it, don’t lose it, and let your parents see how well you’re taking care of it. | #*Take care of your current possessions. Keep what you do have, whether it’s a laptop, tablet, or flip phone, in good shape. Protect it, don’t drop it, don’t lose it, and let your parents see how well you’re taking care of it. | ||
#*Act responsibly by attending to your assigned chores, or, if you don’t have specific chores assigned to you, pay attention to what needs to be done around the house and do it without being asked. Take out the trash, set the trash cans out on trash day and bring them back in afterward, change and wash your sheets, clean the dog poop out of the yard, wash the dishes in the sink, straighten up the living room, etc. | #*Act responsibly by attending to your assigned chores, or, if you don’t have specific chores assigned to you, pay attention to what needs to be done around the house and do it without being asked. Take out the trash, set the trash cans out on trash day and bring them back in afterward, change and wash your sheets, clean the dog poop out of the yard, wash the dishes in the sink, straighten up the living room, etc. | ||
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=== Asking for the Phone === | === Asking for the Phone === | ||
| − | #Choose your moment. Carefully select the right time to approach your parents for this conversation.<ref>http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/relationships/professional/how-to-ask-for-what-you-want?page=1</ref> | + | #Choose your moment. Carefully select the right time to approach your parents for this conversation.<ref name="rf2">http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/relationships/professional/how-to-ask-for-what-you-want?page=1</ref> |
#*Choose a time when they’re calm and not stressed or distracted. | #*Choose a time when they’re calm and not stressed or distracted. | ||
#*Don’t pounce on them right when they get home from somewhere--and especially don’t approach them as soon as they’re home from work. | #*Don’t pounce on them right when they get home from somewhere--and especially don’t approach them as soon as they’re home from work. | ||
| − | #*Don’t try to open the topic when other people are around. You don’t want potentially jealous siblings in the room, nor do you want to approach your parents if their friends or relatives are around (they’re more likely to be stressed or distracted).<ref>http://counselingmn.com/how-to/how-to-get-your-parents-to-say-yes/</ref> | + | #*Don’t try to open the topic when other people are around. You don’t want potentially jealous siblings in the room, nor do you want to approach your parents if their friends or relatives are around (they’re more likely to be stressed or distracted).<ref name="rf3">http://counselingmn.com/how-to/how-to-get-your-parents-to-say-yes/</ref> |
| − | #Open the conversation calmly and with gratitude. First and foremost, you need to have the right attitude when approaching your parents with this request.<ref>http://www.huffingtonpost.com/hanaan-rosenthal/advice-for-teens_b_2037523.html</ref> | + | #Open the conversation calmly and with gratitude. First and foremost, you need to have the right attitude when approaching your parents with this request.<ref name="rf4">http://www.huffingtonpost.com/hanaan-rosenthal/advice-for-teens_b_2037523.html</ref> |
#*Open the conversation calmly and maturely with something like, “Do you guys have a few minutes? There’s something very important I’d like to talk to you about.” | #*Open the conversation calmly and maturely with something like, “Do you guys have a few minutes? There’s something very important I’d like to talk to you about.” | ||
#*Lead into the discussion with a demonstration that you appreciate the things they’ve already given you and the amount of time and energy they put into helping you on a daily basis. You might say something like, “I really appreciate how much time and effort you put into helping me with my homework and making dinner [or fill in the blanks according to your situation]. And I’m really thankful for the bike you gave me for Christmas because it’s really helping me to get around [or, again, fill in as appropriate].” | #*Lead into the discussion with a demonstration that you appreciate the things they’ve already given you and the amount of time and energy they put into helping you on a daily basis. You might say something like, “I really appreciate how much time and effort you put into helping me with my homework and making dinner [or fill in the blanks according to your situation]. And I’m really thankful for the bike you gave me for Christmas because it’s really helping me to get around [or, again, fill in as appropriate].” | ||
#Take the pressure off. Before asking the question, preface it with something like “You don’t have to say yes or no right now” to let them know that you’re willing to give them time to think it over. | #Take the pressure off. Before asking the question, preface it with something like “You don’t have to say yes or no right now” to let them know that you’re willing to give them time to think it over. | ||
| − | #*Taking away the pressure of an immediate response will help your parents listen to what you have to say without immediately making up their minds; when parents have to immediately decide something, the answer is often no.<ref | + | #*Taking away the pressure of an immediate response will help your parents listen to what you have to say without immediately making up their minds; when parents have to immediately decide something, the answer is often no.<ref name="rf4" /> |
| − | #Ask the question politely and sincerely. When you’re ready to pose the question itself, do so politely but also sincerely--that is, don’t be obviously obsequious or saccharine. It will only make your parents suspicious of you and your true motives.<ref | + | #Ask the question politely and sincerely. When you’re ready to pose the question itself, do so politely but also sincerely--that is, don’t be obviously obsequious or saccharine. It will only make your parents suspicious of you and your true motives.<ref name="rf2" /> |
#*Form the question so that you’re opening a dialog rather than dropping a bombshell. You might, for example, say something like “I’d like to talk with you about my getting a smartphone.” | #*Form the question so that you’re opening a dialog rather than dropping a bombshell. You might, for example, say something like “I’d like to talk with you about my getting a smartphone.” | ||
#Offer to contribute towards the cost. Showing your parents you care enough and are responsible enough to save money to put towards the phone may help convince them you’re ready for one.maybe even offer to pay most of the cost. | #Offer to contribute towards the cost. Showing your parents you care enough and are responsible enough to save money to put towards the phone may help convince them you’re ready for one.maybe even offer to pay most of the cost. | ||
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#*A number of tracking apps allow you and your family members to keep track of each other, which can be particularly helpful for parents who tend to worry frequently about your whereabouts. | #*A number of tracking apps allow you and your family members to keep track of each other, which can be particularly helpful for parents who tend to worry frequently about your whereabouts. | ||
#Explain that a smartphone will help you study. Smartphones are perfect for getting work done anytime, any place. | #Explain that a smartphone will help you study. Smartphones are perfect for getting work done anytime, any place. | ||
| − | #*More and more school assignments require internet research, and with a smartphone, you can do your work while waiting for the bus, in between classes, etc.<ref>http://www.chronicle.masoncomets.org/11.1/files/assets/downloads/page0022.pdf</ref> | + | #*More and more school assignments require internet research, and with a smartphone, you can do your work while waiting for the bus, in between classes, etc.<ref name="rf5">http://www.chronicle.masoncomets.org/11.1/files/assets/downloads/page0022.pdf</ref> |
| − | #*There are all kinds of great study- and productivity-enhancing apps available to download to help you with everything from note-taking to brainstorming to task management.<ref>http://www.teachthought.com/apps-2/20-best-study-apps-for-plugged-in-student/</ref> | + | #*There are all kinds of great study- and productivity-enhancing apps available to download to help you with everything from note-taking to brainstorming to task management.<ref name="rf6">http://www.teachthought.com/apps-2/20-best-study-apps-for-plugged-in-student/</ref> |
#Remind them of how well you’re doing in school. If you did the groundwork of keeping or getting your grades up, now’s the time to let it work for you. | #Remind them of how well you’re doing in school. If you did the groundwork of keeping or getting your grades up, now’s the time to let it work for you. | ||
#*Don’t just tell or promise your parents that you’ll do well in school if you have a smartphone. Instead, have physical evidence to back you up--a report card, some exams you aced, a recent project or paper, etc. | #*Don’t just tell or promise your parents that you’ll do well in school if you have a smartphone. Instead, have physical evidence to back you up--a report card, some exams you aced, a recent project or paper, etc. | ||
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#*Instead of having separate devices for all of your work and entertainment needs, you can carry just one smartphone. So your parents will have fewer devices to buy and you’ll have fewer gadgets to lose or break. | #*Instead of having separate devices for all of your work and entertainment needs, you can carry just one smartphone. So your parents will have fewer devices to buy and you’ll have fewer gadgets to lose or break. | ||
#Remind them of parental controls. It’s not uncommon for parents to worry about what their kids can access on the internet, particularly if the internet lives in their pocket. So try to head these concerns off at the past. | #Remind them of parental controls. It’s not uncommon for parents to worry about what their kids can access on the internet, particularly if the internet lives in their pocket. So try to head these concerns off at the past. | ||
| − | #*If they have reservations about what you can access with your smartphone or about how much you might use your smartphone, tell them not to worry. Remind them that they can set parental controls on the phone to put their mind at ease.<ref>http://www.cnet.com/news/how-young-is-too-young-for-a-cellphone-or-smartphone/</ref> | + | #*If they have reservations about what you can access with your smartphone or about how much you might use your smartphone, tell them not to worry. Remind them that they can set parental controls on the phone to put their mind at ease.<ref name="rf7">http://www.cnet.com/news/how-young-is-too-young-for-a-cellphone-or-smartphone/</ref> |
#*Your parents can set controls via your cellular carrier that include limits on the number of texts and calls you can make, as well as the amount of purchases you can make and the amount of data you can use per month. | #*Your parents can set controls via your cellular carrier that include limits on the number of texts and calls you can make, as well as the amount of purchases you can make and the amount of data you can use per month. | ||
#*Your parents can also set specific controls using your smartphone’s operating system, including setting up safe search on your phone’s browser and on YouTube. | #*Your parents can also set specific controls using your smartphone’s operating system, including setting up safe search on your phone’s browser and on YouTube. | ||
| − | #*Finally, there are a number of smartphone apps designed specifically to enable additional parental controls on the phone.<ref>http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,2817,2407509,00.asp</ref> | + | #*Finally, there are a number of smartphone apps designed specifically to enable additional parental controls on the phone.<ref name="rf8">http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,2817,2407509,00.asp</ref> |
#Demonstrate responsibility. Many parents have reservations about their kids not knowing the right and wrong things to do with a smartphone, so help reassure them. | #Demonstrate responsibility. Many parents have reservations about their kids not knowing the right and wrong things to do with a smartphone, so help reassure them. | ||
#*Remind them of how it will help you learn money-management. Not only will you be demonstrating financial responsibility if you offer to pay part of the cost, you can also continue to hone your financial skills with the number of helpful tools and apps available on a smartphone. | #*Remind them of how it will help you learn money-management. Not only will you be demonstrating financial responsibility if you offer to pay part of the cost, you can also continue to hone your financial skills with the number of helpful tools and apps available on a smartphone. | ||
| − | #*Certain apps will allow you to draw up a budget and then help you to follow it while others allow your parents to set up a list of chores and a monetary amount for you to receive upon completing them.<ref>http://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/banking-faqs/7-great-money-apps-kids/</ref> | + | #*Certain apps will allow you to draw up a budget and then help you to follow it while others allow your parents to set up a list of chores and a monetary amount for you to receive upon completing them.<ref name="rf9">http://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/banking-faqs/7-great-money-apps-kids/</ref> |
#*Talk about your knowledge of responsible phone use: describe your understanding that you shouldn’t--and won’t--send inappropriate text messages or images and tell them you understand that certain kinds of apps will be inappropriate and will let them have final say on what you have on your phone. | #*Talk about your knowledge of responsible phone use: describe your understanding that you shouldn’t--and won’t--send inappropriate text messages or images and tell them you understand that certain kinds of apps will be inappropriate and will let them have final say on what you have on your phone. | ||
#*If you really want to show them how serious you are, tell them that you and they can write up an agreement which you can all sign outlining what you will and won’t do with your phone. | #*If you really want to show them how serious you are, tell them that you and they can write up an agreement which you can all sign outlining what you will and won’t do with your phone. | ||
