Talk to Girls Online

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Talking to girls online can be intimidating at first, but once your conversation is started, it’s easy to build a relationship. There are multiple websites and games that provide chat platforms to connect with girls. Whether it is a dating website, an online game, or a chat forum, these simple steps will give you the confidence you need to start a conversation with any girl.

Steps

Setting the Stage

  1. Choose the platform that you’d like to use to chat with a girl. There are many websites and platforms to choose from that include ways to connect with girls. Consider online games, dating websites, or blog forums as possibilities when trying to find a girl with similar interests as you.
  2. Present your best in your online profile. Wherever you choose to connect with someone, your online profile will be scrutinized. Be sure that you are presenting yourself in the best light by exhibiting the unique qualities that you would want others to perceive. When creating an online profile, be literate; bad grammar, bad spelling, and even text speak can be a huge turn-off to girls.
    • Remove any negative or disrespectful photos.
    • Delete posts that are disrespectful or inflammatory.
    • Post a profile picture that accurately represents your personality[1]
  3. Use a unique greeting. Many people open conversations with “hey,” “hi,” “hello,” or “holla”, but these words are overused and not easily remembered. Using a unique greeting will ensure that you will be memorable to the girl you are talking to. Instead of the mundane greeting that won't make you stand out, try one of these openers[2]:
    • “What's Up Wonderful"
    • “How are you today”
    • “Howdy”
    • “How’s it going”

Attracting Her Interest

  1. Ask open ended questions. Now that you've started a dialogue, it's time to keep the conversation going. Avoid yes or no questions. Open ended questions specific to her, will encourage her to become engaged in the conversation. Find shared interests through online profiles and expand your conversation around common ground.
    • Ask “What types of outdoor activities do you enjoy?” instead of “Do you like sports?”
    • Build common ground with things like, “I got a dog in college, what animals are your favorites?
  2. Only send one message at a time. Avoid seeming spammy by limiting your responses to one message for each one received. This is a way to encourage the conversation to move forward so that she wants to keep talking to you.
  3. Flirt/Tease a little. Give her a compliment focused on part of the conversation or her personality. It is OK to have some fun with your conversation and show your sense of humor.
    • "Talking with you has been one of the best parts of my day."
    • "Just when I thought everyone online was fake, I meet you."
    • NOTE: Avoid complimenting physical appearances at this point. Phrases like “You’re hot” or “sexy” may seem like a good idea, but they give the impression that you are shallow and only care about looks. Use the information you have learned as the conversation develops to build the base of a fun relationship.
  4. Keep the conversation focused on her. Find common interests that you can relate to and share personal experiences. Do not dominate the conversation by making it about you, but keep her involved by showing you are interested in the same things she is.
  5. Be gracious and leave her wanting more. Express your happiness that you had the opportunity to talk with her. Let her know that you want to talk again by casually creating the opportunity to talk again. Try these lines and you can create an opening:
    • "This has been awesome. I hope we can talk again soon!"
    • "You mentioned (pick something from your conversation), I wanted to email you an article I found. What's your email address?"
    • "I gotta go, but I really want to hear more about _______, will you email me a link to your favorite site? My email is ______________."

Developing a Relationship

  1. Exchange emails. Open up deeper conversations through email. You can create a stronger relationship by sharing personal stories or events from your life. Make a connection last by showing her who you are and being honest about your past.[3]
  2. Comment on current posts and pictures on social media accounts. Keep her thinking about you by keeping up with what she's doing on social media and engage in conversations through comments and likes.
  3. Be patient waiting for a reply. Remember that she has a life too, and don't expect an instant reply to every email. It may take her a few days to respond to your emails, so be patient and let her respond before you send multiple emails. [4]
  4. Ask her out and meet in person. Once you have exchanged four or five emails, it's time to bring the relationship into the real world. Ask her what her schedule is for the next week and pick a day that she's free. Tell her the time and place you'd like to meet, and be confident. She'll appreciate that you are able to make decisions.
  5. Enjoy your date! You put in a lot of work to get to this point in a relationship that started online. Be yourself and remember her interests from your early conversations to keep the date from going stale.
    • NOTE: Be sure you tell family and friends where you're going and when to expect you back just to be safe!

Tips

  • Read her online profile before you try to start a conversation. It is good to know who you are talking to, but don’t act like you know everything about a person by reading their profile or you may come across too strongly.
  • Avoid “Text speak” and use real words when communicating online.
  • Use emojis sparingly. It’s best to let her use them first and then limit yourself to one per message but not in every message.
  • Be friendly and open when talking online. You can create an online persona that is completely new, just be sure to be honest and true to yourself.

Warnings

  • Be cautious when giving out your personal information.
  • Keep friends and family updated when you are going to meet someone for the first time!

Sources and Citations

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