Tell Coworkers You're Pregnant

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Finding out you’re pregnant is an exciting time. However, you may not be excited to tell your boss or coworkers. Many women get nervous about how their colleagues will react to their happy news. To tell your coworkers you are pregnant, choose the right time to tell them, tell your boss first, talk to HR, and avoid giving them specific plans about your leave.

Steps

Deciding When To Tell Your Boss and Coworkers

  1. Choose the right time to tell your boss and coworkers. When you tell your boss and coworkers that you are pregnant is an individual decision. Some women tell them early, while others wait much later. This depends on how you feel about people knowing you are pregnant. Just make sure you tell them when the pregnancy starts to affect you physically, especially if you need to miss work.[1]
    • Many women tell their coworkers around twelve weeks, right around the beginning of their second trimester. Some wait until they start showing.
    • Tell your boss before your coworkers. This helps avoid your boss finding out about the pregnancy through office gossip, which may result in a negative reaction.
  2. Prepare answers for their questions. Before you talk to them, think about what questions or concerns your coworkers may have. They may want to know how soon you plan on taking maternity leave and how much work you think you can continue doing. You may also be asked general questions about your health.[2]
    • Be prepared for any negative or discriminatory questions. Imagine yourself hearing these kinds of questions and responding to them. This can help you keep your professionalism if someone reacts negatively instead of having it catch you off-guard.
  3. Ask colleagues who have been pregnant for advice. If there are other women in your office who have had to tell your colleagues and boss that they were pregnant, talk to one that you trust about their experience. Make sure to communicate that you are telling her in confidence.[3]
    • You may say to your coworker, “I know you had to tell our colleagues that you were pregnant in the past. I was wondering if you could give me some suggestions about the best way to tell them.”
    • Only talk to someone you trust. You don't want someone telling the office that you are pregnant before you are ready to tell them.

Telling Your Boss

  1. Tell your supervisor first. Before you tell your coworkers, tell your boss that you are pregnant. This should be someone you report to directly. This helps keep your job legally protected. They cannot fire you for being pregnant if you have told them directly. However, if they hear gossip that you are pregnant and fire you, then you cannot claim they discriminated against you because of your pregnancy.[4]
    • Telling your boss before they hear it through others also helps demonstrate your professionalism. It also can help get your boss on your side instead of against you.
  2. Set up a meeting with your supervisor. Be proactive and set up an official meeting with your boss. Don’t ask if you can meet randomly during a work day. Make sure both of you have scheduled time for the meeting. If you are nervous, remember that being proactive about telling your boss is a professional and respectful way of handling it.[5]
    • This will also help you not to back out from telling your boss about your pregnancy if you get nervous.
  3. Present your boss with a work plan. You may help your boss soften to the idea of your being pregnant if you give them some suggestions about your work. Present them with a list of projects you need to finish before you go on maternity leave and what you think you can finish. Present a list of projects or assignments that will need to be completed during your absence.[6]
    • Give your boss a list of people you need to contact to tell that you are pregnant and won’t be in the office.
    • You can also tell your boss whether or not you will be able to check emails or take any time during your leave for work-related tasks.
  4. Meet with HR. After you tell your boss about your pregnancy, you should set up a meeting with human resources. This meeting can help you figure out the information about your maternity leave. You can find out how much paid and unpaid time you have and any documents you need from the doctor, like a projected due date or confirmation that you are pregnant.[7]
    • You also should find out what regulations your company has if you have to go on bed rest. Also find out what paperwork you will need to provide if you have any complications.

Telling Your Coworkers

  1. Decide if you should talk to certain people privately. There may be certain people in your workplace that you should talk to privately instead of with other coworkers. This might include managers or supervisors, partners or team members, or HR contacts.[8]
    • Think about each person you need to tell. Figure out if someone will receive the news better if they are told one on one. This also may give you a chance to let that person know you are still dedicated to your job despite your pregnancy.
  2. Avoid giving your coworkers any specific plans. Because you don’t know exactly how your pregnancy will pan out, you shouldn’t give any specific plans or make any promises. Instead, you can relay what you hope happens during your pregnancy or your general plans.[9]
    • For example, you may say, “Right now, the plan is to work until this point and stay on maternity leave for the full number of weeks. I hope nothing happens that prevents this from happening.”
  3. Bring a treat in to announce your pregnancy. If your office is the type of place where they will accept your pregnancy, you may want to have fun with it by bringing in a treat for everyone. You can bring a food you crave, like cookies, cupcakes, bagels, or donuts. Place pink and blue decorations on top, like balloons, booties, safety pins, or pacifiers.[10]
    • You can have them guess what news you have, or have a big announcement during lunch or break before handing out treats.
  4. Host a small announcement party. If your office environment is friendly and supportive, you may want to have a small get together during lunch or a break to announce your good news. You can bring a few decorations and some refreshments and share your good news.
    • This can be a fun way to celebrate with your coworkers.
  5. Remain professional after telling them. If you work in a non-supportive environment, maintain your professionalism after you tell your coworkers about your pregnancy. Avoid telling your coworkers too much information about your pregnancy or baby-related tasks. Remember, you are there to work, not to tell them about your pregnancy tasks.[11]
    • For example, try not to make every conversation about preparing for the baby. You should also be wary of letting people touch your belly, especially if you wouldn’t let them touch you normally.

Sources and Citations